I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Randomize
