I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
