Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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