She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
