Plan B is the new Plan A
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
