Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
