so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
