fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Randomize
