just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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