I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
and you fell through a lawn chair
Randomize
