Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
