Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I've got a whole match.com system. Triple book. First dates always get the 6pm happy hour drinks slot. 8pm dinner goes to a girl where I think I can close the deal. 10pm slot goes to the sure thing in case of emergency, but 6 can always trump 8 and 8 always trumps 10. Just blame it on a dead iPhone battery.
That, my friend, is how I bang 50 new girls a year. Not luck at all. It's science and statistics.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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