I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
This is my gift to your gina
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
