Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
