Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize
