So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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