sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
