And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
