8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she pinky promised me she was 18
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
