R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
