Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize