he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize
