Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I'm at about main and main street
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
