Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌ï¸
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just forgot I was standing up.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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