I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
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