whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
