Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize
