Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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