Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
