...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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