If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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