Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize