Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
