Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
