so that wasnt chicken after all
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize