took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize