I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize