Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Randomize
