what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
