Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
