...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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