White coat. Heels.
ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
