Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
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