So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Randomize