you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Come back. Shots need mouths.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
