once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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