it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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