Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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