even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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