Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
