And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
3pm strippers are depressing
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Randomize
